Fathers' Day?

Dew Factor: 1.5

One of the many beautiful things about  football at the 'Wam is the multi-generational experience:

Take Sunday, for example:  There was patriarch Hank Burns playing along side both his sons and his grandsons.  Then there's Bobby Strauss (missing from photo & disappointed at wimpy rule changes) whose son Jesse was a mid-2000's star (when he could get out of bed).  Add to that Steve LaBossiere with sons Carter and Hunter; Ted Tibbetts whose son Gawain has played for several weeks; Chris Easton who, through his son Aaron and himself,  has supplied 13 feet of Easton to the 'Wam; and Drigotas⁴  who could pile out of a van supplying two ends and two halfbacks virtually eliminating the need for a short-field setup.

But the true spirit of "the fatherhood of 'Wam" may be best exemplified by Mark Soehren, who not only plays with sons Atticus and Eli, but also lets them perform crucial roles within the Poland Knights football program, which Soehren coaches.

As seen above, Soehren is holding a football.  As can be seen in the lettering on the football (left), it is a Poland Regional High School football ("PRHS" -- the "HS" is obscured).  A closer look shows that this is clearly child's writing.  Only a father-of-the-year would let a child have the important task of marking balls to make sure opposing teams don't steal them.  Hat's off to Mark Soerhen for letting his children protect both the honor and budget of the Poland Knights.

Still Missing -- Not Impressed
Hat's NOT off to the two remaining MIA's for 'Wam 2010 -- Jay Tilley and Matt Corbett.  Tilley, who has a long standing reputation as a dink only has one week to uphold that distinction.  Corbett, well, who knows.  The only way to get an email response from him is when you receive the automated "out-of-office-won't-be-back-until-whenever" reply when he's on vacation...maybe he'll show up on Thanksgiving when Ivan makes an appearance.

Hank Burns gets the Square Toe Award:

Where the Hell is Everyone?

Dew Factor: 4.5

In an otherwise wonderful day, the 'Wam faithful were left wondering, "where is everyone" playing a game one short of the ideal 6-on-6.

Missing were Jon, Bill, Chris Gordon, the Soehren family (apparently "out of state"), the Hill family and, yet to show up this year, the LaBossier family.

Additionally, here's who we haven't even seen this year: Jay Tilley, Matt Corbett,  and Kris Wright.

Despite the distraction of the holdouts, Ted Burns (the square-toe winner) had an excellent game with several catches including a David Tyree catch holding the ball against his head.

Also having great games were first-timer Ian Lejonhud (whose father Dana snapped for then-kicker Brewster Burns in 1979) and Gawain Tibbetts.

Here's who did show up:

 

Player of the game, Teddy Burns:

10 On 10-10-10

Dew Factor: 10.10

Showing unprecedented support for the belief that random numbers mean something in the world of man-made arbitrary numbering systems, 10 players showed up on October 10th, '10.

Although it took a while to recognize the significance, and even longer to learn to ignore that it was actually 10-10-2010 instead of the nicely packaged 10-10-10, the 'Wam 10 had a ceremonial 10-count at 10:10 AM.  The play, dubbed 10-10-10-10-10, was run against a 10-10-10-10-10 defense, with 9 sitting out at every layer.  (For those of you counting, that's 10-10-10-10-10 against a 10-10-10-10-10 at 10:10 on 10-10-10.)

The pass was incomplete and the game continued into oblivion.

Notably missing was Chris Easton, whose contract stalled after asking to $10.10 to show up. 

The 'Wam 10:

 

Co-players of the game:

No More Pouting

Dew Factor 8.75

Mark Soehren strode tiumphantly over Mutiny Brook Bridge proclaiming, "I'm done pouting," referring to the difficult season he's had at the helm of the winless Poland Knights football team.

To understand how far Soehren had to come, one needs only look at how he spent his Saturday night.

The Knights squared off against the Lake Region Lakers in a game that would hand the victor its first win of the season.  Down at the half, Soehren attempted to rouse his players with a speech described by Ted Tibbetts as the loudest yelling he's ever heard from Soehren since they met 9 years ago.  The Knights ended up on the short end of the stick, losing 24-0.

The loss may not have been the low point:  Just after half, in an event unrelated to Soehren's half-time rant, Soehren's 9-year-old son Atticus was curled up in a ball under the bench with blood covering half his face after a tooth-to-the-head collision in a little kids' game that was played nearby.

Soehren's other son, who had been told not to bother Soehren during the game "unless there's blood," got his dad's attention, telling him, "Atticus is bleeding."

Welcome back Mark.

Following the introduction of Jon to 'Wam footbal in week 3, the 'Wam also welcomed newcomer Bill.  Again, newcomers only get a last name after a full season.

The addition of Bill brought the total of actual football players to three (Tibbetts, Bill and Soehren), which made some huddles in need of an interpreter to help 'Wam veterans with terms like "dig," "flag" and "spy."   The 'Wam vets retaliated by calling archaic rush violations on Tibbetts 7 different times.  (Click the "Rules" tab to see the rush rules defined.)

The participants (minus Hank Burns and Chris Easton who left early):

Player of the game, sort of: